Is anyone this drastically different sober vs not sober?

I know it is a common saying that drunk actions are sober thoughts. But when I do drink, I am not nearly the same person I am sober. And it is honestly quite scary. Sober me is timid, shy, and heavily anxious. I barely talk or make eye contact.

When I get drunk I’m loud, talkative, confident, and just make decisions I’d never in my wildest dreams do. I feel that this addiction started partly because of this and how much I hated being anxious all the time and in turn, poorly perceived by society. I keep thinking I’m more fun drunk. Or I have more personality. So when I’m sober I just feel lame and anxious.

But I know it’s good for me to stay sober. I really hate that I discovered alcohol and thought it was some magical cure to my anxiety as a teen, because now it just ruins my life being so dependent on it.

I just want to know. Is it this drastically different for anyone else, especially those with anxiety? I feel crazy for it being basically TWO different people.