Hello I’m still tapering from high dose of Benzo and my 30 birthday is in 2 days and I wanna drink a beer or two

Long story short..
I have GAD , PD with agoraphobia…
Was drinking beer and smoking weed for 15years straight daily.

For last 3 years I’ve been drinking on 4-5mgs of Xanax (10 beers daily and smoked a lot of weed and I function normal had a job bicycle courier and I drive every day about 100km on hot sunny day,had energy had motivation etc.)

I Cold Turkey Alcohol and weed same day 11 months ago and my benzo intake has tripled since i stopped and I never felt shittier for this 11 months.
I managed to get down from 12-15 mgs of Xanax to 2mg of Klonopin and 4 mg of Xanax. I never had such agoraphobia as I have now and I still didn’t drink or lite a joint in this 11 months.

Today I was at my Psychiatrist who only wants to put me in 2 week detox program and I won’t go to it because I’m not stupid, anyway I asked her can I drink 1 beer even lemon beer with 2% alcohol in it and will I die she said I won’t die but just don’t drink 10 beers and took 10mgs of Xanax, and that I will go back to drinking.

Fist of all I will never go back drinking daily never never because the withdrawals were brutal , I just want to celebrate and be relaxed for my 30 B-day instead being unsociable anxious all time etc…

Can I drink 1-2 beers or even a glass of beer? I don’t think anything could go wrong because I’ve drank 3years on 4 mgs of xanax and a shit ton of weed daily and I was function completely normal, no brain fog no depression had energy and I was living life( I know it’s not good and sounds stupid but at least I was living, wasn’t depressed wasn’t so anxious and I could move and not being stuck in house or my hood without having panic attack because I developed agoraphobia when I stopped drinking and when I started to taper….Now I barely leave my house.

Don’t get me wrong I just can’t take this anymore