Anyone else upset that alcohol dosent work for them?

Ive drank like 2 mabye 3 times in my whole life once when I turned 18 and 2 more times at a club and for some fucked up reason it just dosent work for me like how it works for everyone else pop culture pretends that alcohol makes you forget your problems or gives you liqour courage but for some fucked up reason its just not like that for me

I dont even enjoy the feeling of being drunk I more enjoy the taste which is woody and smokey with the right spirit

As a person with depression alcohol just makes me depressed and socially awkward am I doing somthing wrong am i not getting drunk enough?

I tried to get as drunk as possible the first time and had like I think 5 or 6 shots of vodka im a big guy but my sister cut me off cause she wanted me not to go overboard

Same thing happened with edibles are Depessants not my thing

Do I just try cocaine /j

The reason why I care so much is i want a coping mechanism thats less destructive than my current ones cause as much as alcohol is bad for you its better than the alternatives when i cant get my brain to shut up