술:익다

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Is it a problem to think about alcohol often?

For context, I used to drink way too much. It was a problem. I quit and that was that. I’ve enjoyed sobriety (almost 3 years) and it’s been all good.

One thing I hear a lot about is that it’s a sign of a problem if you think about booze too much. I go through periods where I think about it every day, and others where I don’t think much about it all week (I should note I have ocd and adhd, which means ruminating/cyclical thoughts is normal for me). And although I think about it every day at times, I’m not dying to have one, it’s not ruining my day or anything, but I do often think, “some beers would be good tonight,” then go about my day and enjoy my sober evening.

Last month I had some beer. It was alright and I enjoyed them, though not as much as I used to. It was nice to not have to feel like I was “hiding” from it anymore. I don’t like the feeling of running from something, so to speak.

A couple weeks later I had some more. I’m talking 3 – 6 regular beer. During the in-between I thought of it, probably as much as I did before, which was often, and was able to move on with my day and not feel overly compelled to buy any.

Is this thinking about it problematic? It can be difficult to get answers/ideas without hearing so many cliches like, “if you have to ask, it’s a problem.” I mean really, is it weird to think about it or anything that much? I also enjoy playing music and think about/look forward to enjoying that on my weekends as well. Is the “looking forward to” a problem in and of itself?

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