Depression or alcoholism

First time posting on Reddit and I just wanted to ask anyone if they feel similar.

I could say I feel most of the time depressed but tbh don’t have a valid reason to be depressed about, I married fairly young, 3th child in the way now, have my family in town (brothers and parents in). Got an easy and well paid job, got much savings I can pay off my mortgage , but investing it and that’s main focus (I do overpay my mortgage but in a way it doesn’t affect me highly – paying same amount of mortgage rate extra each month ). My main focus is investments, to make enough profit in ~10 years to not need to work and to make my family not depend on labour work (passive income). It’s achievable but why, the older I get i understand if I don’t have something to occupy my mind I will go nuts and go fully mid life crisis as in films (just do anything to occupy your mind with high end toys). I’m thinking since 3 years, ok if my investments earn enough or if I just didn’t need to work, what I would do? And of course answers appear but they are very short lived, like taking care of family, garden, reading books, learning language or musical instrument but it’s still for me right now pointless, I keep finding something to do but feel it’s a distraction, it keeps me occupied, but I can’t be happy, I was happy when playing stupid games at 16-19-yeara old but now it’s just “maintaining” – doing anything you can to just survive, that’s where alcohol filled in, now alcohol feels like the only relieve, the only goal (even hitting some great targets are just excuse for partying with other people).

Can have a lot of things successful during the day , so then I can finally have a drink (cause it made stress to make success,l but why stop here, I can be successful every day on my trading days, but that’s it’s not enough, I feel now I need more to cover my family expense, but still keep thinking about it. If I don’t need to work, what I would do? ( Right now my honesr opinion is that I would OD on alcohol, the dream is I would go snowboarding, kitesurfing, live on a van.)