is drinking to calm nerves bad?

hi all! just what the title says. I’m scared that if I drink to calm my nerves or to feel better, I’ll develop alcoholism, but I thought I’d ask here. it’s hard to gauge what is an actual risk, because I feel like the consensus on health forums is “never ever drink” and I just don’t think that’s necessary… how much is too much, and how will I know if I’m becoming an alcoholic? I’ve only been drunk a handful of times, and only with my friends.