Piss on things when blackout

Ok, this has only happened twice.

Both times I was totally blacked out. Throwing up. Incoherent etc.

What happens is once I find a place to sleep, I’ll wake up and piss on random things at the house.

Like it’s almost like I pick a thing and go fuck you and piss. It’s not like random.

So ashamed. Honestly makes me never want to drink again.