Alcohol as a tool

I didn’t have my first drink until my 30s and I’ve never really been “drunk.” I used to convince myself that alcohol was something to be avoided, something shameful to partake in. After getting bored one day and wanting to experiment, I’ve realized this isn’t the case at all. For me alcohol is a tool and not something to be used recreationally. I have started to utilize those tiny, single serve bottles of Jack Daniels. After consuming two of them in rapid succession I have significantly reduced my anxiety, sense of self hatred and found that it’s just the right amount to increase my focus on whatever I am doing. I work in customer service and when dealing with people I feel detached, angry, anxious and I want nothing to do with them. After a bit of chemical help I am much different. It makes me kind, outgoing and better able to complete my job duties. I do not consume alcohol every day or even every week, but I now utilize the material to meet demanding work situations or when unhappiness becomes too much. I still have not been and will never be “drunk” as I know my limits. Two of those small bottles is enough to benefit. Having experienced the uses of alcohol consumption I really do not understand why people drink as a means of recreation or why people drink to the point of excessive intoxication.