A few nights ago I was almost arrested.

So yeah, like the title say, the other night I was almost arrested. I have been an alcoholic probably since I was 14. But I know for sure I have since I was 29/30 I’ve known it but I have been in denial. I didn’t drink every night and on the nights I did drink I was able to set a limit and usually I was able to stick to it. And so I knew I had a problem but I felt like I was in control and so I thought I was fine. But my marriage of 12 years ended back in June and since then I have been free to do whatever I want, I also lost my job and so I have nothing but free time. I’m very angry and depressed. So naturally, I immediately started drinking every night. And then one morning I woke up and thought “that’s not good enough” so I started drinking in the morning too. I have been drinking all day and all night for about 4 months. It’s starting to affect my health, my head, my everything. I’m making bad decisions. So a few nights ago I was drunk out of my mind and decided to go meet up with a girl at a motel. And for whatever reason she didn’t show up. My phone died. I couldn’t get ahold of anyone. The man working at the hotel told me he had no vacancies. And he wouldn’t let me use his phone. I have been staying with my mom, which was a fairly far distance from where I was at the time. So I was stranded at 1am, wandering around in the dark trying to figure out what to do. Then a cop shows up and I explain to him the situation, and I was open and honest. I admitted I was very drunk. And showed him that I still had the bottle on me. And I told him “I just wanted to go home…just please take me home and I won’t come back out” and thankfully for me this cop was a good man and he had a heart, and I guess he felt for me. He agreed to drive me home and not arrest me. Which I appreciate so much…he had the absolute right to arrest me and I would have deserved it. But he didn’t. And I am still so, so thankful. I told him what a good man he was and how much I appreciate it. So yeah, I was very lucky. I’m going to see this as a sign that God was looking out for me and he was giving me a 2nd chance to stop messing up and start doing things right. I’m going to quit drinking…I’m considering rehab, even though I’m not in love with the thought of going away for a while. But the alternative is either jail or death, and I don’t want either. I’m a 33 year old man with a wonderful daughter. I have to be here for her future. Plus I have to set a good example for her. I’ve been selfish. But this is the last of that nonsense. I’m cleaning up and choosing life.